London, UK – Prime Minister Keir Starmer is “really proud” to finally implement digital ID in the UK. “We’re about forty-one years late in ushering in our grand vision of 1984 ,” said Starmer, “because… because umm… we love free speech, which we’ve had for too long, I mean, a very long time.” The new digital ID system is intended to help combat illegal immigrants, particularly regarding access to government services and employment. “We know it’s easier to stop people from get

Alderaan (GNS) – Imperial Fleet Command has stated that the ceasefire agreement has come into effect. “We have retreated to the agreed...

Breaking Gay News: Piece of Sh*t Pleads Not Smelling Like Sh*t

Detroit, MI – As the Illinois state government battles the Trump administration regarding the deployment of the National Guard, mostly...

Los Angeles, CA – ABC News correspondent Matt Gutman reported that the “specific text messages” Lucifer wrote to himself before his act...

Sacramento, CA – Just days after President Trump revoked former Vice President Harris’s Secret Service protection “cos she wasn’t even a...

Washington DC – The FBI is searching the home of John Bolton on Friday. The raid began at 7 am and is reportedly continuing at the time...

Sacramento, CA – The rat infestation across California has baffled some scientists as much as almond farm owners and other rodents. “NYC...

Just saying hypothetically…