Previously Secret Documents Reveal New Frigate Doesn’t Have to Float
Canberra, Australia – According to previously secret documents just released to parliament regarding the $45 billion frigate program, the...
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- 3 days ago
- 1 min
Australia Years Behind Realizing They’re Years Behind in Mathematics
Melbourne, Australia – According to the latest OECD Program for International Student Assessment (PISA) results, Australian high school...
50
- 6 days ago
- 2 min
Lucifer Shouted “I Can’t Breathe” During Arrest
St Michael’s, MN – Scholars from the American Liberal Theologians Association have issued a paper that the rebelling angel Lucifer...
60
- Nov 23
- 1 min
Boy Stops Packing Up Lego, Claims It Is Gaza
San Francisco, CA – Mrs Tanaka was baffled that his son Shin, 10, no longer packs up his Lego. “He is usually very disciplined,” said Mrs...
40
- Nov 13
- 1 min
New Electric Vehicle “Evangelion” to Enter Market
Austin, TX – A new electric vehicle manufacturer has entered the market. Intended to compete with Tesla, Genesis will release their first...
40
- Nov 13
- 1 min
Man Realizes Presbyterian Woman a Snob after Blind Date
Melbourne, Australia – A man has realized that the woman his friends had set him up with is a snob after all. “I’ve met quite a few...
50
- Nov 10
- 1 min
Pro-Choice Woman Says Palestinians Not Allowed to Kill Babies, Only We Are
Columbus, OH – Bonnie is celebrating as Ohio voted to enshrine abortion rights in its constitution. “I’m so happy,” said Bonnie,...
60
- Nov 8
- 1 min
Senator Bibble: Optus Outage Signals Droid Invasion
Melbourne, Australia – Optus is still trying to determine the cause of today’s nation-wide outage of its mobile phone network and...
40
- Oct 30
- 1 min
Jedi Master Who Wanted “Harsher Lockdown Policy” Asks for Forgiveness
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Jedi Master Anakin Skywalker appeared on a recent episode of Real Time with Jar Jar Binks alongside...
30
- Oct 16
- 1 min
Palpatine Did Not See “Confirmed Pictures of Jedi Beheading Children”
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Chancellor Palpatine said on Wednesday that he had seen “confirmed pictures of Jedi beheading...
40
- Oct 13
- 1 min
Empire Calls for Civilians to Leave Alderaan
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – The Imperial Armed Forces on Friday called for all civilians of Alderaan, more than 2 billion people,...
50
- Oct 12
- 1 min
Yes-Man to Vote Yes in the Voice and Everything Else
Sydney, Australia – Joe White-Collier, a 36-year-old office worker, will vote Yes in the upcoming historic Australian Indigenous Voice...
60
- Oct 8
- 1 min
Exclusive: Commander the German Shepherd Abused?
Washington DC – One week after Commander the German Shepherd was removed from the White House due to multiple biting “incidents”,...
20
- Oct 3
- 1 min
Man Excommunicated for Pulling Fire Alarm to Stop Long Church Service
St Paul, MN – Re-re-reformed Lutheran Church has excommunicated a man for pulling the fire alarm during the sermon. “We try to be...
30
- Oct 3
- 1 min
Latest Study Brings Good News to Vaccinated Women
Given no few studies have been published regarding unexpected vaginal bleeding in women after receiving mRNA vaccines, Feiser Research...
60
- Sep 27
- 2 min
My First Battle Against Russians
Los Angeles, CA – From the company that brought “My First False Flag Government Building Storming” now comes “My First Battle Against...
30
- Sep 13
- 1 min
Evergrande Collapse Led to Tower of Babel Failure
Los Angeles, CA – Theologians at Ultra-Modern Christian Seminary speculate that the construction of the so-called Tower of Babel was not...
40
- Sep 12
- 1 min
Theologians: Only Vaccinated Animals Boarded Noah’s Ark
St Paul, MN – Theologians at Just-the-Cross Seminary have answered one of the most-asked questions: How could Noah have fitted all the...
50
- Sep 5
- 1 min
NZ PM Hipkins Announces New Slogan: “Mandate Is Non-Compulsory”
Wellington, New China – Prime Minister Chris Hipkins has announced a new party slogan: MANDATE IS NON-COMPULSORY. Regarding the vaccine...
60
- Jul 29
- 1 min
Trump Charged with Deleting Surveillance of His Midnight KFC Feast
Palm Beach Gardens, FL – The Department of Justice has filed new charges against Donald Trump in addition to the original 34 counts of...
110
- Jul 23
- 2 min
Asian Boy Identifies as a Cat That Identifies as Human
Melbourne, Australia – An Asian boy in primary school who identifies as a cat has subsequently reverted to identifying as human. Tommy...
70
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