Despite Fuel Crisis, Airlines Remain Efficient

Sydney, Australia – Due to the continuing conflict between the US, Israel and Iran, fuel prices are soaring.

Airlines such as Qantas, however, have reassured travellers that they remain as efficient as ever—at increasing airfares.

“Jet fuel supply is volatile, blah blah blah,” said Qantas spokesperson Will Ripov. “We love it when someone threatens the fuel even if it doesn’t directly impact us, cos we can then jack up the prices—well, as long as they don’t shoot us down like Malaysian Airlines.”

Qantas has also reassured travellers that they are stocked full of orange juice.

“We are still totally committed to providing passenger comfort as we squeeze everyone dry,” added Ripov.

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