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TIME Magazine’s Person of the Year: Megatron
Megatron has been chosen as TIME magazine’s Person of the Year. According to the announcement...
Feb 7, 20211 min read


Church Puts Professional Drummer on Probation
St Paul, MN – Re-re-reformed Lutheran Church has put their newest drummer on probation. This follows the excommunication of one of their...
Jan 29, 20212 min read


Two Species 8472 Suffer Allergic Reaction to Voyager/Borg Nanite Vaccine
Delta Quadrant (FNS) – The Federation has issued a warning that any of Species 8472 who have a history of “significant” allergic reaction...
Jan 25, 20211 min read


My First Fake Inauguration Day
Los Angeles, CA – Given the moderate success of the newly released “My First False Flag Government Building Storming”...
Jan 22, 20212 min read


Pornsnub Deplatforms Popular Actress
Montreal, QC – Pornsnub, which has over 10 million videos and had over 40 billion site visits last year, has permanently banned the...
Jan 17, 20211 min read


Study Reveals Real Cause of Clinton Deaths
San Francisco, CA – It is common knowledge that there is an anomalously high number of deaths connected to Hillary Clinton. Amongst other...
Jan 16, 20211 min read


Guillotine: A New Social Media Platform
San Francisco, CA – Given all the recent social-media post removals, account suspensions and bans, and entire platforms such as Parler...
Jan 14, 20212 min read


My First False Flag Government Building Storming
Los Angeles, CA – Just over a year ago, Mattel released “gender-neutral” dolls in recognition of the LGBTQ and gender-fluid community.
Jan 12, 20212 min read


Francis Approves Change to “Lord’s Prayer”
Vatican – In an interview on Sunday night, Pope Francis said, “I believe that, ethically, everyone should take the vaccine.” And in light...
Jan 11, 20211 min read


Star Wars to Address the Environment
Los Angeles, CA – Disney has announced that some of the upcoming Star Wars series will also focus on environmentalism.
Jan 10, 20211 min read


Pelosi: Trump Needs to Immediately Go for Stealing My Laptop
Washington DC – Nancy Pelosi has called for the immediate removal of President Donald Trump, claiming that the President sanctioned...
Jan 9, 20212 min read


10U Lineman Breaks Multiple Records
Cincinnati, OH – Eli Gable is a born lineman. At 16 years of age, he stands at 6’3” and already weighs 291 lbs. Since he identifies as a...
Jan 5, 20211 min read


Aschen Enters COVID Vaccine Race
Cheyenne Mountain, CO – Not to be outdone by the Vidiians and the Borg, the Aschen have entered the race to make the COVID-19 vaccine.
Jan 4, 20211 min read


Gigachurch Wins Church Games
Phoenix, AZ – A non-denominational gigachurch won the 2020 Church Games held in Phoenix Thursday.
Jan 1, 20211 min read


Alexa Goes Green
Seattle, WA – Amazon has announced the new Alexa Green for home energy management. The familiar functions such as music playback...
Dec 28, 20202 min read


Palpatine Defunds the Jedi
Galactic Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Chancellor Palpatine has officially defunded the Jedi as part of the re-organization of the Republic...
Dec 28, 20201 min read


Laundromat Thrives Despite Lockdown
Phoenix, AZ – When lockdowns were implemented, many small businesses suffered, even if they were permitted to remain open.
Dec 23, 20201 min read


New Bible Improves Readability
Grand Rapids, MI – The new Post-New International Version Bible (PNIV) will be more readable than any previous version.
Dec 23, 20201 min read


More Footages from Wisconsin Voting Centers
Milwaukee, WI – More CCTV footage from voting centers across the country have surfaced, particularly from Wisconsin where many votes for...
Dec 21, 20201 min read


CDC Consults Expert Statisticians
Atlanta, GA – Given the controversy surrounding the infection and death rates due to COVID-19, the CDC has hired a dozen expert...
Dec 19, 20201 min read


Church Excommunicates Guitarist and Drummer
St Paul, MN – Re-re-reformed Lutheran Church has excommunicated a guitarist and a drummer. This follows the excommunication of...
Dec 17, 20201 min read
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