London, UK – In response to the twelve soccer teams announcing their breakaway Super League, the UK blames Russia.

“Vaccination alone is no guarantee that you can open up,” said Minister Hunt. “If it did, it might actually make sense then...

New York City, NY – An elementary school in New York has blocked one of its students from attending her online English classes for...

New York City, NY – CK has announced that the fragrance CK One will now be released as CK Ninety-one in recognition of all the genders...

Here are the next four cards! Rah! Don’t like them? Well, too bad. There are more in the pipeline and, barring the outbreak of WWIII...

Not that we’re encouraging the practice of magic or the occult… but hey, if the world is run by psychotic occultists, then why can’t we...

St Paul, MN – Just-the-Cross Baptist Church had its longest service last Sunday, clocking at four hours and twenty minutes.

Mos Eisley, Tatooine (GNS) – The Empire has been enforcing lockdowns across the galaxy in recent months. Although only for short periods...

Sydney, Australia – Tiff Conway is a size-6 model, and although her career has been successful so far, she wants to diversify her portfolio.

Redwood City, CA – EA has announced that the upcoming update for Madden will reflect the pandemic conditions.

Hollywood, CA – The trailer for the upcoming Mortal Kombat live-action film was released on Friday and it has been revealed that Emperor...

Zürich, Switzerland – The Global Council of Churches (GCC) announced a new model to facilitate unity for the various Christian churches...

Mos Eisley, Tatooine (GNS) – Tatooine is banning force-sensitive pilots in all their podraces. This includes those who identify as...

Philadelphia, PA – Alex Hamilton, age 36, was arrested for a bank robbery last week and appeared in court yesterday for the plea hearing.

Beverly Hills, CA – President Joe Biden has announced that schools will re-open within his first 100 days in office as previously promised.

Megatron has been chosen as TIME magazine’s Person of the Year. According to the announcement...

St Paul, MN – Re-re-reformed Lutheran Church has put their newest drummer on probation. This follows the excommunication of one of their...

Delta Quadrant (FNS) – The Federation has issued a warning that any of Species 8472 who have a history of “significant” allergic reaction...

Los Angeles, CA – Given the moderate success of the newly released “My First False Flag Government Building Storming”...

Montreal, QC – Pornsnub, which has over 10 million videos and had over 40 billion site visits last year, has permanently banned the...

San Francisco, CA – It is common knowledge that there is an anomalously high number of deaths connected to Hillary Clinton. Amongst other...