liberal nonsense | Opinyuns

Lamentabili Sane by Pope Pius X

Pope Pius X (b. 2 June 1835 – d. 20 August 1914), born Giuseppe Melchiorre Sarto, began his pontificate on 4 August 1903. He is known for opposing modernist thought and as a bishop proposed a new catechism for laymen in 1880. The decree “Lamentabili Sane: Condemning the Errors of the Modernists” was published on 3 July 1907 by the Sacred Congregation of the Holy Office at the command of Pope Pius X. This is not to be confused for the famous “Syllabus of Errors” issued in 1864

6 days ago4 min read

Company Promotes Women in Office During Mass Layoff

Los Angeles, CA – A company is promoting and celebrating women in the workplace. “We’re not simply interested in having women as cleaners or the average minion in the office, that’s been going on for decades; we want them to be executives and CEOs,” said CEO Cliff Dushpaggery. Dushpaggery takes the innovative approach by constantly releasing company newsletters about women in the office and how much he wants them to be executives. “Well, maybe not while I’m the CEO but you kn

Aug 211 min read

Une Fois Encore by Pope Pius X

Pope Pius X (b. 2 June 1835 – d. 20 August 1914), born Giuseppe Melchiorre Sarto, began his pontificate on 4 August 1903. He is known for opposing modernist thought and as a bishop proposed a new catechism for laymen in 1880. The encyclical “Une Fois Encore” was published on 6 January 1907. It is relatively short at approximately 2,800 words in 21 paragraphs and is “On the Separation of Church and State” given the French government’s stance regarding the Church at the time. P

Aug 134 min read

Vehementer Nos by Pope Pius X

Pope Pius X (b. 2 June 1835 – d. 20 August 1914), born Giuseppe Melchiorre Sarto, began his pontificate on 4 August 1903. He is known for opposing modernist thought and as a bishop proposed a new catechism for laymen in 1880. After his elevation to the papacy, he worked on that and released a catechism. It was, however, only used in the province of Rome and other parts of Italy and not the rest of the world. The encyclical “Vehementer Nos” was published on 11 February 1906. I

Jun 67 min read

Trump Just Wanted to Bail on Dinner

Washington DC – President Trump and the Secret Service have denied that they again just wanted to have a group hug on stage during the White House Correspondents’ Dinner on Saturday night. “We did that at Butler,” said President Trump. “I just wanted to bail on the dinner this time… I mean, I love some of these people but some of them are fake news. And the bread wasn’t that good.” The president added that he “also really wanted to have that big, beautiful ballroom” but has d

Apr 261 min read

My First Fatal Federal Agent Shooting

Los Angeles, CA – From those who brought us “ My First False Flag Government Building Storming ” back in 2021 is the first release of 2026: “My First Fatal Federal Agent Shooting”. The set comes with two high-quality ride-on cars. One of them has an electric motor and multiple bullet holes in the windscreen for the driver. There is also a BB gun for the ICE agent. The car is no ordinary ride-on car. The obnoxiously loud horn will sound continuously for at least a few minutes

Jan 141 min read

Minnesotan Students Have Ulterior Motive for Encouraging ICE Protests

Minneapolis, MN – After the fatal shooting of 37-year-old Renee Good by ICE agents, Minneapolis Public Schools have cancelled classes for the remainder of the week “out of an abundance of caution”. “We like being cautious, like putting tampons in boys’ toilets in case they need them,” said public school official Georgina Kantdrife, “so we thought we cancel school in case staff want to go protest ICE.” At least some Minnesotan students agree. “I think that’s a great idea,” sai

Jan 81 min read

Green Day Denies Gayness but Confirms Extra Guitars

San Francisco, CA – Green Day has denied being “a bit gay” for having three guitarists in their live performances. “We don’t have three guitarists,” said Billie Joe Armstrong. “We actually have six, they all play the exact four-chord riffs while the bass just doubles up on all that. And we aim to be more like lesbians rather than gay.” Armstrong also states that to make up for the lack of gayness when they only have three guitars on stage, he uses extra eyeliner and black nai

Jan 41 min read

New Slant Eyes Beauty Pageant Proposed

London, UK – In the aftermath of Miss Finland 2024 Sarah Dzafce being stripped of her title for making the Asian “slant eyes” gesture, a new beauty pageant has been proposed. The new competition will showcase how good looking the contestants are when doing slant eyes. “I think it’s important that we uphold the principle of universal tolerance and respect,” said Beth Horship, spokesperson for Miss World Slant Eyes, “and this contest is the perfect platform to celebrate freedom

Dec 15, 20251 min read

Boy Forbidden to Riot, Disappointed

Nashville, TN – An elementary school student is severely disappointed that he has been forbidden from rioting after finding out that French President Emmanuel Macron had allegedly put a hit on Candace Owens. “I don’t get it,” said George, 10, of Cabalsville Elementary School, “I would’ve thought that nowadays a white man trying to kill a black woman is like the near-perfect excuse to peacefully trash the place.” However, George is willing to consider an alternative view: “I g

Dec 1, 20251 min read