Lori Lightfoot Denies Working as a Gargoyle above Church Door
Chicago, IL – Since Lori Lightfoot lost her job, there have been unconfirmed sightings of the outgoing mayor. An unverified report, which...
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- Feb 28
- 1 min
Australian PM Albanese’s Mardi Gras March Not the Group Hug He Wanted
Sydney, Australia – Anthony Albanese has become the first Australian Prime Minister to march in the Mardi Gras parade. “It’s unfortunate...
50
- Jan 4
- 1 min
Twitter Worked with Presbyterians to Suppress Free Will
San Francisco, CA – Twitter Files have revealed that the platform worked with presbyterians to suppress free will. “It’s important we...
30
- Dec 22, 2022
- 2 min
Twitter Files: PE Teachers Not Real Teachers
San Francisco, CA – Twitter Files have revealed that the platform’s Trust and Safety staff have suppressed tweets promoting the idea that...
80
- Dec 15, 2022
- 1 min
Pelosi Portrait Unveiled!
Nancy Pelosi’s official Speaker portrait was unveiled on Wednesday in a ceremony held in the Statuary Hall.
120
- Nov 22, 2022
- 1 min
Crybully Defends Free Speech Unless He’s the One Bullied
Bali, Indonesia – At the B20 Summit, a Canadian crybully emphasize in a speech that free speech must be defended. “Whilst always ensuring...
50
- Nov 5, 2022
- 2 min
New Colored Domestic Bins!
In an effort to save the planet, new colored bins approved by the WEF have been introduced garnering rave reviews from celebrities,...
40
- Nov 2, 2022
- 2 min
Newsom Notices There’s Sewage
In an interview on CBS, California Governor Gavin Newsom expressed the view that Jesse Watters’s comments on Fox in “the last five, six...
40
- Oct 15, 2022
- 1 min
Katie Hobbs: I Will Only Debate Kari Lake in Restaurant Toilet
Even as early ballots arrive via the mail for the Arizona governor’s election, democrat Katie Hobbs has yet to debate republican Kari...
90
- Sep 4, 2022
- 7 min
The Abolition of Man by C.S. Lewis
The Abolition of Man: Reflections on Education with Special Reference to the Teaching of English in the Upper Forms of Schools was a...
60
- Aug 29, 2022
- 1 min
Local Presbyterian Church Produces Redacted Bibles
Detroit, MI – A local presbyterian church has produced a heavily redacted version of the bible. “Just because protestants killed off a...
90
- Aug 24, 2022
- 3 min
The Revolutionary Catechism by Sergey Nechayev
The booklet The Revolutionary Catechism was written by Sergey Nechayev (b. 2 October 1847 – d. 3 December 1882), a Russian communist...
30
- Aug 20, 2022
- 1 min
California: Soy Sauce to Represent Diversity
Los Angeles, CA – The Californian government has officially announced soy sauce as the condiment that represents “diversity”. “It’s a...
40
- Aug 4, 2022
- 1 min
Emmy Nomination for Rebel Journalist Who Reported “Fiery but Mostly Peaceful Protests” at Death Star
Yavin IV (RNN) – Rebel journalist Ramo Zenemij is one of the five nominees for Emmy’s “Outstanding Emerging Journalist” Award. Zenemij is...
30
- Jul 28, 2022
- 1 min
Disney to Reboot All Star Wars Films
Los Angeles, CA – Given the recent losses Disney suffered, it has announced that it will remake all Star Wars films. “I know some people...
280
- Jul 10, 2022
- 1 min
Summary of All Science Debunking Anti-COVID Measures
Summary of all scientific literature that debunks anti-COVID measures.
130
- Jun 25, 2022
- 1 min
Employers: Productivity Plummets after Roe vs Wade Overturn
Los Angeles, CA – Employers of big and small businesses across the country have complained that productivity immediately plummeted after...
40
- Jun 22, 2022
- 1 min
High School Baseball Player Suspended for Hitting to Far-Right Field
San Francisco, CA – David Uchikomu, Wakeham High School’s star outfield slugger, has been suspended for continuously hitting to the...
80
- May 16, 2022
- 1 min
Matrix Reboot Has Morpheus Offer Abortion Pills
Hollywood, CA – The Matrix will be rebooted with the character of Morpheus offering the character of Neo abortion pills. “It’s important...
40
- May 10, 2022
- 1 min
Everyone Gets a Choice!
According to Whoopi Goldberg on The View regarding abortion: "My doctor and myself and my child, that’s who makes the decision."
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- May 5, 2022
- 1 min
Elizabeth Warren in “Scream 6”
Hollywood, CA – Senator Elizabeth Warren will produce and star in Scream 6, the latest in the successful film franchise. “The threat to...
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