Detroit: The New ICE Detention Center Post-Lidstrom Era?
- Simian Practicalist
- Oct 7
- 1 min read
Detroit, MI – As the Illinois state government battles the Trump administration regarding the deployment of the National Guard, mostly peaceful protests against ICE continues in one of its neighboring states.
Overnight in Detroit, several gas stations were set ablaze after protesters firebombed their ice storage freezers.
“Those things are labeled ‘ICE’,” said one protester, “so it must be related to ICE.”
“And we want everything on fire anyway, and ice is cold so we can’t have that!” said another.
Firefighters worked all night containing the blazes.
“I’ve lived and worked in here all my life,” said Fire Lieutenant Bradbury. “Our city has really gone downhill since Lidstrom retired. The Dead Wings can’t make it into the playoffs and all we have is some sad person with a confectionery name who thinks rap is music.”
The fires as well as other mostly peaceful protests have not deterred ICE officers from carrying out arrests and deportations.
“The way things are going,” said one ICE Supervisory Special Agent Kahn, “we don’t need to deport people back to the crapholes they came from, we could just take them to Detroit.”
Be sure to subscribe to our mailing list so you get each new Opinyun that comes out!
Comments