Emperor Palpatine Defends Chaotic Endor Withdrawal


Emperor Palpatine Defends Chaotic Endor Withdrawal

Imperial Senate, Coruscant (GNS) – Emperor Palpatine has hailed the “extraordinary success” of the imperial withdrawal from Endor.


Last Sunday, the Ewoks swept through the forests with little resistance, eventually surrounding the imperial spaceport. Palpatine praised the efforts of the imperial stormtroopers that held the perimeter and aided the evacuation.


As Sentinel-class transports continuously airlifted imperial citizens away, many arrows were fired and rocks thrown at imperial personnel. There were also a few explosions near the spaceport that killed thirteen stormtroopers. Intelligence reports indicate that the Rebels-K, led by Princess Leia, was responsible.


Journalists on the ground noted the tons of imperial hardware left on Endor which the Ewoks and Rebels have taken. These include blasters, speeder bikes, AT-STs and lots of stormtrooper helmets.


The emperor had vowed that any imperial subjects injured during the evacuation would be considered “a red line” and will continue to “target militants who pose a threat to the Empire”.


Nevertheless, Palpatine defended his decision to not deploy more stormtroopers. “I will not extend the exit. Regardless of what was negotiated and planned by the previous administration—that is, the Jedi Order—this was always going to be difficult. I had sent Lord Vader to directly deal with the Ewoks. I would have sent him to handle Tatooine as well but he ‘doesn’t like sand’.”


GNS cannot confirm whether Lord Vader was on the surface of Endor and there are unverified reports that Death Star II, which orbited Endor, suffered a catastrophic explosion.


Meanwhile, the criticisms from the Imperial Senate regarding the Endor withdrawal has ceased since the emperor has dissolved it. “They’re mistaken,” said Palpatine, “and besides, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I am the Senate.”

 

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