White House Warns of COVID Taliban Strain

Washington DC – Although Biden’s prediction on July 8 that the Taliban will not take over Afghanistan has turned out to be wrong, the White House is now warning that the COVID Taliban strain may sweep across the country.


“Look, these situations are always fluid,” said a White House staffer, “which is our way of blaming the intelligence community without officially blaming them because we can’t in this case. But now that we know the Taliban are capable of taking a country quickly, it’s important we learn from this experience.”


Indeed, two hours ago, the White House issued a statement:


“Given the current circumstances and with advice from the CDC, we are issuing a general warning that the COVID Taliban strain may spread very quickly across the country. Preliminary modelling shows that this is a particularly strong possibility when Delta infections drop.


“The public is advised to wash their hands like people with OCD, wear masks, take six shots of the vaccine and don’t talk to anyone.”


White House Warns of COVID Taliban Strain
 

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