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Simian Practicalist

Harris Buys Fried Chicken

Washington DC – US Vice President Kamala Harris on Saturday visited a local fried chicken shop and walked out with a big twelve-piece bucket.


“I normally don’t take on twelve at a time,” said Harris, “but I need to prove how black I am.”


Harris Buys Fried Chicken

Harris also indicated that it was a “mixed bucket of original and Jamaican spice”.


“I’m sure they taste great and will go well with the music I bought some time ago,” she added. “You know, the music I bought from the record store.”


Before going to the fried chicken shop, Harris could not help first stopping at a nearby 7-Eleven to buy a few bottles of cheap bourbon.


The 7-Eleven is, however, operated by Mrs Kwan who was not impressed.


“I no care about Kabala Harrit or Gay White Dudes for Harrit,” said Kwan, “Yerrow People for Orange Man, I say.”

 

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