Washington DC – Dr Antony Fauci has warned that just because the US is currently exiting the “pandemic phase”, new COVID variants can still pose a danger.
“We’ll just have to admit that the Omicron variant doesn’t do much damage,” said Fauci. “And that Omicron seems to provide decent immunity. Nevertheless, new variants can be evasive.”
In addition, Fauci highlighted the need for more COVID funds. “We still need vaccines… after all, people aren’t dying fast enough. We’ve got to supply the fourth and fifth and sixth shots, you know.”
When asked if there are any variants of concern, Fauci answered, “There is still the Beta-Sigma strain, but the one to really look out for is the H111ARY strain. That one seems very dangerous, could make you act like a crazy bitch and then kill you just by looking at you from afar. I suspect many people have died from it already without knowing it.”
Bill Gates agrees with Fauci’s assessment: “As a self-declared expert, I can say that the H111ARY strain is very dangerous. Not sure where it comes from, but I assure you that it’s got nothing to do with biolabs in Ukraine, that’s just conspiracy theory.”
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