Eagle Pass, TX – Texas AG Ken Paxton rejected the Biden administration’s request to grant federal officials access to a park along the border.
“Unlike the Cowboys, our defense will show up”, said Paxton, “I mean, just cos those Cowpokes can’t do anything, doesn’t mean the rest of us can’t try.”
The situation escalated when Governor Greg Abbott issued an invasion declaration earlier in the week.
“For now, we’ll probably just play zone,” said a Texas state official on the condition of anonymity, “but depending on how the deep state wants to play it, we might need to play man or maybe even blitz. You can blitz a s— quarterback.”
Be sure to subscribe to our mailing list so you get each new Opinyun that comes out!
