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New Colored Domestic Bins!

New Colored Domestic Bins!

In an effort to save the planet, new colored bins approved by the WEF have been introduced garnering rave reviews from celebrities, corporate CEOs, the NBA, and the LGBTHUA communities. Move over toddler-aged cis boys, the adults are going loco over basura.

White: For as long as we can remember, black/dark gray is for regular trash but that’s just racist, so only throw that stuff into the white bin now. Alternatively, just dump it anywhere because any form of cleanliness, tidiness and organization are social constructs that are merely tools of oppression.

Pink: This is for all your monkeypox, AIDS and pointless COVID-19 PCR tests. And manpons.

Red: We all know why you have to take so many tests but fret not. Whatever filthy dental dams, other latex, clothing, bedsheets, hammers or whips soiled by your unbridled horniness can go in this bin. Diapers go in here as well, not because you have children but because you’re loose as a horse.

Orange: Any pamphlet and brochure that is not woke enough goes in here to be recycled so it can be later used for your favorite leftist revolutionary movement. Home abortions can go in here too.

Yellow: Asian takeaway food scraps, not to be confused for other food scraps. If you’re too uncultured to tell the difference, don’t worry because pretty soon there may not be any food.

Green: One assumes this is for garden waste and maybe vegetable scraps. However, since you have put that cucumber where it doesn’t belong and, quite frankly, the fact that your filthy body and soul have even touched the garden renders all of it unfit for this bin. Just use it for whatever you feel like it because that’s what most lazy people do anyway.

Blue: It is recycling but now it’s only for gas appliances. Remember, you must now buy electric or you risk being raided by some heavily armed government agency you’ve never heard of. As for your non-electric car, in case you haven’t worked it out, you can’t fit your car into this bin so you have to take it apart and throw out a few pieces at a time. Any stash of voting ballots you’re not comfortable delivering because you’re afraid you’ll be caught can go in here.

Indigo: This is your other recycling bin for any book or printed media that is considered misinformation by the government. Rest assured that no law enforcement agent or any government employee will go through this bin. It’s like gun buybacks, no questions asked except there’s no money.

Violet: Ditching your car isn’t enough, it is now federal law that you must get rid of the fuel. For disposal, cars and fuel tanks need to be emptied for safety and environmental reasons, so fuel goes in here. The federal government assures that the fuel will be disposed of safely and not be reused.


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