National Football League Renamed to National Vaccination League
New York City, NY – The joke that the NFL stands for “not for long” may turn out to be half-true after all.
Consistent to the league’s recent push for strict COVID protocols and vaccinations of players and staff, the league is renaming and rebranding to the National Vaccination League (NVL).
The logo will be altered accordingly but the style will remain the same.
“The letters F and V admittedly look different,” said Commissioner Roger Goodell, “but marketing assures me that phonetically the /f/ and /v/ are consonant pairs or whatever… Basically, they f-sound and v-sound are close enough is what I am told.”
Some have questioned the appropriateness of replacing the football with a syringe in the logo. According to Goodell, however, it is fitting given recent NFL history. “There was that thing about deflating footballs or whatever, so I don’t see how a syringe is inappropriate. Come to think of it, I think we should vaccinate the footballs too just in case. Can’t be too safe nowadays.”
“The way these pandemic protocols are shutting down everything,” said a defensive coordinator on the condition of anonymity, “I wish we had such good defense.”
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