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Simian Practicalist

Boy Fails Test despite Being a “Middle-class kid”

San Francisco, CA – After having been awarded for “attempting” every test question in fourth grade, Jake of Wakeham Elementary School has raised his ambitions.


“Now that I am in fifth grade, I better do more,” said Jake.


Jake has been practicing his handwriting so that it is at least semi-legible.


Boy Fails Test despite Being a “Middle-class kid”

In the first test of the academic year, Jake answered the first two questions. He then attempted all remaining questions by simply writing “I am a middle-class kid and I work at McDonald’s.”


Mrs Clarkson was barely impressed.


“I might have tolerated it if it was an English test,” said Clarkson. “Except it was a math test. If Jake really works at McDonald’s, then he could have answered questions 3, 7 and 11 about giving the correct change.”


Nevertheless, failing the test does not disqualify Jake from becoming class president although Mrs Clarkson “cannot see Jake doing well in debating class”.

 

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