Adam Schiff to Run for Miss California
- Simian Practicalist
- Jan 27, 2023
- 1 min read
Updated: Jan 20, 2024
Los Angeles, CA – Democrat Adam Schiff has announced that he will run for Miss California.
“We’re in the fight of our lives,” said Shifty Schiff, “I mean lies. Someone has to keep a lid on them.”
Still livid from his ejection from the House Intelligence Committee by House Speaker Kevin McCarthy on Tuesday, Schiff said, “Miss California is a good place to lead the fight cos Trump is always involved with pageants so I can maybe go after him again if I run.”
When asked whether pageant officials will allow a man to run, Schiff answered that “anything goes nowadays” and he has “a really nice wig and a matching dress”.
“That and I’m a lying pussy,” he added.
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