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Simian Practicalist

Walz: Good to Shove Tampon Up Truck Exhaust

St Paul, MN – Tim Walz, the Democrat nominee for vice president in the 2024 US presidential election, has demonstrated that he is just like his ordinary voters.


Walz: Good to Shove Tampon Up Truck Exhaust

“I didn’t want to do a barbeque like Chuck,” said Walz, “cos unlike him, I’m not that much of a fan of sausages. But Paul Pelosi with a hammer gave me an idea.”


After long discussions with his campaign staff, he decided instead to show off his white picket fence and how good he is fixing his truck.


“Cos you know, I like fixing things,” said Walz, “by using a manual… there’s a manual for everything and there’s like one for shoving a tampon up the exhaust. Really gives the exhaust a good clean and I think America needs that as soon as possible, so vote for us!”

 

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