London, UK – In response to the twelve soccer teams announcing their breakaway Super League—six of them English—the UK government have vowed to fight the move, blaming Russia for the latest “interference”.
UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson issued a statement: “The Russians have already moved tens of thousands of troops to the border of Ukraine. As if that’s not enough, they have to meddle with our soccer leagues as well. This will not go unanswered.”
When it was pointed out that only one of the breakaway teams is owned by a Russian, PM Boris answered, “Well, it only takes one to ruin things… Still, we will seriously consider our course of action.”
Meanwhile, although Germany and France have condemned the Super League and find the possibility of Russian meddling “troubling”, neither government has committed to any action.
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