Omaha, NE – Given the recent severe weather in the midwest, a man has been questioning whether his children have been playing with more than just the central heater settings.
“I know it when they’ve been touching the thermostat,” said the father of two. “But with what’s been going with all the tornadoes and stuff, I’m wondering if they turned on HAARP and have been fiddling with the settings.”
The children, Jane, 17, and Robert, 12, have both categorically denied any involvement with any component of weather modification technology.
“I turned down the heater the other night,” said Jane, “cos the house was like an oven but I don’t know anything about HAARP.”
The authorities have not responded to comment regarding this matter.
Nevertheless, the father is adamant that someone has been “screwing around with HAARP”.
“I know something is going on, and it’s not just me. All the guys at the Fathers Against Children Touching the Thermostat (FACTT) think so too,” he said. “I mean, we can’t all be wrong, it’s in our acronym.”
Be sure to subscribe to our mailing list so you get each new Opinyun that comes out!
