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Simian Practicalist

Asian Teenager Invokes “Science” to Finally Convince Parents

San Francisco, CA – Park Ji-eun, 14, finally convinced her parents that she was really sick and allow her to not go to school.


“Normally, they would just say I am faking it and send me to school anyway,” said Park. “But for some reason, they are very lenient with psychopathic strangers who run a plandemic, believing all their claims to be genuine.”


Park, however, worked out the secret to convincing her stereotypically insensitive Asian parents who believe just about anyone, including mainstream media, more than their own children.


“All I had to do was invoke the word ‘science’ and say something that sounds lamestream,” she said. “I don’t need any actual scientific data, I just need to throw the word in there somewhere and say that I got an ‘A’ for it.”

 

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