Shanghai Disneyland: Lockdown Actuarry an Attraction

Shanghai, China – The latest lockdown at Shanghai Disneyland in which visitors may not leave without providing three negative COVID-19 test results is not what it seems.


“It’s actuarry our latest attraction,” said Disneyland spokesperson Comrade John Lee. “We have prenty of rides but this is our attempt to make a really immersive experience.”


Lee elaborated on the change in marketing strategy. “I know many are already used to having their movements tracked and, of course, there’s the social credit system,” he said, “but this lockdown game really hammers home the point.”


Disneyland has assured its visitors that their rides will continue to operate (subject to individual social credit scores) and that this lockdown attraction is free since participation is mandatory.


“By the way,” added Lee, “any visitor caught crimbing the fence trying to escape will be shot.”


Shanghai Disneyland: Lockdown Actuarry an Attraction
 

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