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Simian Practicalist

Man Realizes “Rustic Fries” Just Means It Has Skin and Sprouts

Man Realizes “Rustic Fries” Just Means It Has Skin and Sprouts

San Francisco, CA – A local man who went shopping at the supermarket for the first time in two years realizes that the frozen “rustic” fries just means the fries still have skin and sprouts on them.


“What a rip-off!” said the man. “I can get a 32oz-pack of frozen fries, straight or crinkle cut, for $4.99. But this 20oz-pack of ‘rustic’ fries with skin and sprouts sells for $12.99!”


The manufacturer confirmed that their Frozen Rustic Fries meets their quality control standards which are admittedly different to their other frozen potato goods.


“We like to suck in consumers at least once with the whole ‘rustic’ thing, and it’s not like we don’t peel them at all. We do peel a little just to get the right look,” said spokesperson Ken Potter. “Of course, we have really clean ones nicely seasoned as part of our ‘gourmet’ range. It’s on special for $15.99 because of inflation and all that.”

 

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