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Simian Practicalist

See No Fraud, Hear No Fraud, Speak No Fraud

Apparently, Attorney General William Barr on Tuesday said, “…to date, we have not seen fraud on a scale that could have effected a different outcome in the election.”


Thanks for clearing up that one, sir, that’s nice.


Despite the qualification “to date”, the rest of that sentence sounds suspiciously conclusive in tone and therefore goes against the commonsensical legal etiquette (if not protocol) for an ongoing investigation (assuming there is even one).


But setting that aside, and on second thought, Bill, “not seen fraud on a scale that could have effected a different outcome in the election” is actually a bit unclear. POTUS was ahead by a few hundred thousand votes before counting and reporting suddenly stopped. This was followed by a few hundred thousand votes, mostly for Sleepy Joe. Just a few hundred thousand here and there… Nah, that’s not much.


And weren’t some of these votes from dead people? Weren’t there large groups of voters with birthdays 1 January 1990?


Apparently, a vague dismissive statement pretending to be a well-reasoned answer is good enough, a bit like when your libtard teacher tells you off or a stubborn protestant pretending to argue theology.


Anyway, there is one thing we can say about Bill: he can keep a straight face. Look at Adam “Shifty” Schiff: he can’t even look convincing.



Addendum (7 Dec 2020): Of course, with President Trump, we have to admit, as some commentators are saying, that this is possibly just the usual WWE script. If that’s the case, Bill, we’re prepared to take it all back.

 

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