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Fired Sports Illustrated Staff Shocked No One Wants to Look at Their Saucy Pictures

New York City, NY – Former staff of the prestigious Sports Illustrated are devastated at the announcement on Friday of the mass layoff.


“I can’t understand why people wouldn’t pay for a magazine featuring half-naked women just cos they could view totally naked women for free on the web,” said a photographer. “Don’t people want to pretend it’s a ‘proper magazine’ while looking at saucy photos?!”


“I certainly didn’t see this coming,” said an editor. “It’s not all pictures, there is writing in there. I’d always assumed people like to pretend they’re reading something other than scoreboards and rosters.”


However, not all staff were shocked.


“I’m not that surprised the magazine failed,” said a young intern. “Even on Instagram, you can see way more. The algorithm plasters the barely-dressed on your account regardless of who you follow and what you search for.”

 

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