Macron: “Vaccinations actually for protection against Germans”

Paris, France – French President Emmanuel Macron announced that starting from July 21, a health pass for either having been vaccinated or recently tested negative for COVID is mandatory for entering any café.

Earlier, it was also announced that vaccinations will be mandatory for all healthcare workers from September.

In response to the backlash, the president has reassured French citizens that the push for vaccinations was just a cover.

“Obviously, I wanted to keep it quiet since it’s for your own good,” said Macron, “but the vaccinations are not really for COVID. It’s actually for protection against Germans.”

When asked to elaborate, Macron answered, “It’s not that the krauts are a dirty people, it’s just that in case we have to lick their boots again, and boots always have something dirty on them—I mean, I have to kiss Merkel and give her foot massages all the time.”

Be sure to subscribe to our mailing list so you get each new Opinyun that comes out!